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R: How’s your book going?*
Me: It’s good so far. My only complaint is that, judging from how the main character recovers from injuries like they’re nothing, the author has never fallen off a roof, had a major concussion, been severely burned, gotten in a fistfight or ridden a horse at a gallop for sixty miles in one day after not touching a horse for seven years.
R: What, all at once? Isn’t that how Rasputin died?

*If you wondered if I get Amazon commission, the answer is “HAHAHAHAHA. No.”