The cold from hell has officially ended. I don’t know what kind of satan-virus I had, but I’ve never had a head cold that incapacitating. I’m sure you’re all thrilled about me spending a week bitching about the most common illness ever. While I’m on the subject of my health, have I ever told you about my lumbago?*

Anyway, I’m riding that weird high people get post-minor-illness. You know – colors seem brighter, you have energy, you want to do things, all because you can breathe through both nostrils at once without hating yourself and others. It’s been dead at work, however, so I’ve just been stuck in a perpetual state of antsiness. The good news is that between the cold and work being dead I have managed to read seven books** in the past week without cutting into my exorbitant internet time, so silver linings and all of that. The bad news is that reading and being sick do not funny – or even interesting – times make. Oh well. I’m sure we’ll have a small child humorously puke on the floor at work today, or something. I’ll be back when I have something more substantial to write about. Should be soon.

* It just occurred to me that I’ve been making jokes about lumbago for a long time, but don’t actually know what it is. Alas, Wikipedia is down right now to protest SOPA and my research skills are effectively skewered.*** Damn that SOPA.****
** Booyah, bitches. One a day.
*** I kid, I kid. Run of the mill laziness. I’m sure I have a copy of the Merck manual from 1950 around here somewhere.
**** Dammit, shouldn’t I be boycotting the internet or something today, just to stick it to the SOPA supporters? God knows I would have been the influence that made them weep in shame at such a terrible idea.